Fuzzy Details?

It was a wet morning. I was taking my favorite 4x4 out for a drive.  It was a 1999 Limited Toyota 4Runner with every bell and whistle you can imagine.  I find myself still missing it today.  The rain was pouring down and in Arizona, that is unique.  I had just moved from New Mexico and unfortunately I was not used to such deluges.  As I entered an off ramp, I felt distinctly that my back tires had lost just slight bit of traction. It was then that I remembered that I had forgotten to lock the rear differential by activating the button on the dash.  If it was activated, I am sure that I would still be driving my 4Runner today.  Anyway, as my rear tires lost their traction, I corrected just a bit, and suddenly my rear tires swung violently in the opposite direction.  The rear of my truck slammed the concrete barrier and shot straight toward the opposite side towards a 40-50 foot drop off that was only cordoned by a single metal guard rail.  That guard rail would be put to the ultimate test that day to verify if it was capable of stopping a 2 ton out of control vehicle. I closed my eyes, said a prayer and waited.  All I felt and heard then was the pop of glass and steel as the vehicle tumbled in a direction that I didn't know.  When the vehicle came to a stop, there I was safe and sound, altogether in one piece.  That day changed my life.  I am much more cautious on the exit ramps I travel, almost to a point where I find myself slowing down too much.  Many people today encourage me to let that day become a blur in my mind so I can get over my newly found phobia, but that is exactly what prompted today’s question.  How will you remember life?

Life, if you are an adult, is a much too fast and fleeting anomaly that most of us can’t even begin to comprehend the full meaning of.  People die young, some die old.  Some are taken from us in tragedy and others live on despite their maniacal actions.  In this brief moment we have, we sincerely try to understand the full scope of the life we have been given, only at times to feel a sense of being much too overwhelmed. 

When we boil it down, life can be skipped over like a blur, or it can be fully lived out in detail.  I don’t always want to remember the foolish things I did.  They serve as a reminder of how crazy my life was and I’ll admit, sometimes still is.  But it’s in those details where I find that I truly can see the amazing journey I am on, and also where I am headed. 

When we live life merely in order to get past the day, many of the important lessons I feel we are supposed to learn get washed away.  It is only in those details where we will ultimately find the answers to our questions of, “Why?”

In the meantime, let me encourage you to enjoy the details without regret.  I promise you will fall a few times, lose control a few other times, and sometimes even behave badly, but treasure them.  They are golden moments that move you forward. 

 There will always be Weddings and Funerals, Birthdays and Anniversaries; but it is how we choose to remember them that give our life meaning and purpose. 

I am reminded of the now classic movie “Life is Beautiful.” Ironically, it is a movie about the Holocaust.  What makes this tale so unique is in the way the main character chooses to experience each of the traumatic experiences that are unfolding around him. That’s the answer. Our life will ultimately be what we choose it to be.  Positive or Negative. 

There is no time machine, there is no 2^nd chance, and in no way will we ever be able to exchange our life for that of someone else.  This is our one shot, live it out loud in fine detail, just like it was meant to be! 

-Lou   

The Danger in Being a Sheep.

I saw the other day how a commentator was observing that we have become a nation that heavily follows trends; trends that dictate what we watch, how we dress, the foods we eat and even the way we think.   As a rebel, many times I have turned the opposite way of the trends simply because I don’t like to follow.  Sometimes that has worked in my favor, while at other times being the trailblazer takes a lot of determination, self-will, and perseverance simply because I have experienced that there are not many who will pat you on the back as you blaze that trail in your own unique direction.  I think what scares me the most is that trends kill imagination.  Trends disqualify any original ideas from taking root, and group otherwise great and innovative concepts into a melting pot of less quality but wholly accepted beliefs.  There is a danger in following these trends in a way that I don’t think we will be able to fully understand until those habits have given birth to fully grown and complex issues that can’t be easily undone. 

It is easy to see that our world right now is in a heightened state of conflict.  Everywhere you look, people are debating, rebelling, fighting, or protesting.  As we approach the elections, there is a sense of political heat that no one in the U.S. is able to escape no matter how much they try to remain oblivious to what’s happening around them.  What fuels these armies of protestors and others involved in the conflict is at the root, trends. A trend that they first once believed as a good idea that gave birth to a way of thinking, that grew finally into an all-out belief system where the mindset now is that others with a different opinion do no count, or do not matter. 

I do believe that as trivial as we want to make trends in the world around us, it does shape how we view and live everyday.  On the most controversial of topics, abortion, gay rights, and finances, I think that as people who are more heavily invested in trends than in caring about people disqualify themselves of helping anyone simply because they can not fathom coming along side a person who may have a differing opinion.  That is the danger in being a sheep.  One who follows, even if it nullifies helping, caring or encouraging our fellow man. 

If more of us chose to bravely take the “road less traveled” and cared more about people than policy, would our world look a bit different?

I feel that I will always be a rebel, but I want to do so, not like James Dean’s Rebel Without a Cause, but a rebel for all the right reasons in the hopes that the infestation of people that in a sense, play out their lives with a certain sense of entitlement, or self-righteousness, can finally take a backseat in lieu of genuine care of other people no matter their past, their beliefs, or actions.  Who knows? Maybe one day, we can once again return to and become the United States of America.  

Vermont- My Punch in the Gut

Have you ever seen a place so beautiful, that the moment you saw it, you felt immediately like you had been punched in the gut? For no explainable reason, that is the way I feel about Vermont.  My inner being aches with the hopes that one day I can set foot upon and enjoy just a piece of the wondrous state of Vermont.  Frank Sinatra sang about it, Ben and Jerry call it home; Maple Syrup became famous there, and John Deere made his very first tractor there.  Since first hearing about Vermont, I have always wanted to go. Not as a party of 1 mind you, but the only way that Vermont can truly be enjoyed in all its glory, with the love of my life, as the song by Old Blue Eyes so romanticized in his song. 

Of course I had no Idea even where Vermont was. Sure I studied it and the other 49 as a youth in school, but the years deteriorate the mind fast, and it wasn’t long before I couldn’t pick out more than merely a handful of Eastern states by appearance alone.  When I found out it was way out East beyond New York, I was humorously flabbergasted! I could not believe that in order to get to this amazing Heavenly dot on the map, one had to pass beyond the Northeast border of New York to get there! In fact, depending on what tiny town of visual excitement within Vermont I chose, Maine and Canada were only a hop, skip and jump away!

           “…People who meet in this romantic setting, Are so hypnotized by the lovely...

            Ev'ning summer breeze, Warbling of a meadowlark…Moonlight in Vermont…”

Never before had a state bewitched me so, other than what is now my most recent longing,  the constant sites and over the top (but effective) blatant marketing for the sunny Aloha state of Hawaii as seen through the new Hawaii 5-0 drama series. Vermont is beautiful for so many reasons. It is what the West is not; lush, quiet, secluded. The West in all it’s excitement from Vegas to L.A. can not begin to offer the romanticism that Vermont pours out abundantly from it’s fingertips at the southernmost point in Brattleboro, to the Northernmost edges of Vermont, including Lake Champlain.

Whatever the hold that Vermont has on me, I am hopeful that one day I can exercise the yearning that is within me to drop in from a very long flight, rest my feet on some of God’s most beautiful country, and take it all in; the colors, the sights, the romantic glow that seems to drip steadfastly from every tree, every covered bridge and every piece of antiquated architecture. 

So there you have it, Vermont, my punch in the gut. A place that is so fantastically beautiful, my fear is that once I arrive, I will never want to leave.  I will chase my dreams; my wish is that you have the opportunities to chase yours!

-Lou

“…Falling leaves, a sycamore, Moonlight in Vermont…”

Are You an Island?

…there are days, it seems where we are all our own little islands, each standing for something different with our own individual flags.  And although we might for a brief moment, hop from one island to another or view another’s flag from afar, we in reality are far… from each other.  Maybe that is why our world is so messed up.  With the loss of community we have inherited the gift of ostracism. Our communities of neighbors have been transformed into individuals living through social networks on the internet.  When is the last time you remember getting into the car with your family and just dropping by to visit the neighbors or friends?  Now, if the get-together isn’t driven by some major event, it is deemed that there is no reason to get together at all.  That thought provokes this question in my mind; are we more happy now that the semblance of select-privacy has taken a front seat over a cooperative relationship with friends and family? Or that the motivational banner above us screams, “Life is Really About Us!”  We have all had great times of laughter, but can any of us remember the last time we had a prolonged period of unabated joy?  I for one can not recall such a pure and honest time like when my family or friends got together for a weekend camping trip or an evening out on the porch simply to pass the time away.  With that thought slowly becoming a harsh reality, I am saddened thinking to myself that if I don’t snap awake, if I don’t take those times to do that now, I will surely find myself on my death bed, wishing I had gotten the chance to those very same things I longed for. 

            In life, we have two choices.  One is to lower our head, firm up the chin and head straight into the storms of life, battling as we go, and with each victory moving further and further towards what our perceived dreams, goals, hopes and aspirations might be.  The 2^nd choice is to defer from meeting the storm head on, and pick the unusual route of the vantage point on the hill; measuring what is most important to us and letting the mirage of what people only think “success” looks like pass us by with the sober comprehension of what “success” can really be disguised as; a dangerous distraction that will eat away at the fabric and core of our lives until we are but a shell, wishing we hadn’t missed the train on so many of life’s really important events.

            I am not against the idea of success, but in chasing our goals, have we ultimately lost sight of what is most important?  I for one will pursue many of my personal and professional goals albeit knowing that what is most important to me are the times I miss the most about growing up; the times when we broke away from the daily rituals of the rat race, took off the uniform and invested in an antiquated notion, community.  

10 Things that Scream "I am a Parent of a Small Child!"

      

  I was hanging out with my kiddos the other day, and I thought to myself, "These crazy times are flying by so fast." Although it seemed that my wife and I were on a perpetual cotton-candy carousal where the music always seems a little too loud and just a little too wacky, and where the collection of horses, hippos, dragons, and zebras never cease from going up, down, up, down, it was bittersweet because I knew that this time would never be as long as I would like it to be. Still I hope the following makes you laugh a little, here goes: 

10 Things that Scream "I am a Parent of a Small Child!"

1. The toothpaste cap lasts about a week before becoming permanently “lost”
2. Your daily shower routine involves some type of action figure, Disney character or Barbie doll staring back up at you
3. You always put on your shoes twice- the second time is after you shake out the loose marbles, barrettes, toys or coins you find in them the first time
4. If your normal “cruising” songs on the radio on the way to the mall have anything to with barnyard animals, monkeys or other zoo animals, and some sort of exercise like clapping your hands, turning around, or jumping
5. If you find that it is perfectly normal to watch children’s programming in the evening
6. If you know what “being the horsie” means
7. If your cupboards are stocked with a surplus of sippy cups, silly straws, and various restaurants “kids menu” glasses
8. If you can not remember the last “Big Person” movie you watched in the theater
9. Each morning your feet are greeted by various pens, pencils, crayons, legos or Hot Wheels
10.  All you really crave is to have one adult meal, at a grown- up restaurant sometime before they turn into teenagers!

 Enjoy this time my friends! It won’t last for long!  Life will become much more serious and much faster than you want it to, and these comedic times, where your house looks more like the staging area of a clown’s closet than a home, will grow quiet once more, and I know you will wish you could have this time back again; a time when they are still small, you can still hold them in your arms, and they still look up at you like you are their whole entire world.  Well guess what, you are! Hug them now, kiss them now, and let them squeeze your neck, mess up your office, wear your shoes, create disasters in the kitchen, and dig up your yard while they still have the chance. I promise that these days will be some of the best ones of your life.  Now, isn’t it great to not have a toothpaste cap?

-Live Inspired, Lou 

Hurrying Up or Slowing Down...

Hurry Up Won’t You?

What a beautiful day isn’t it? As people rush around trying to arrive on time to their destinations, I sit at my desk, coffee cup in hand and wonder how long it has been since I have read a book that was truly amazing. I think harder and harder, forcing my memories to push into the farthest and uttermost darkest recess’s of my mind and yet, the only books that I can think about, are the ones that I faintly remember reading quite some time ago.  Books like “Of Mice and Men”, “Screwtape Letters” and “White Fang” come to mind, but there are a few modern ones thrown in the mix that I also recall.  Fairly recent books like “Bringing out the Dead” (this is a great book, later turned into a movie), and Blood Work, (again, another movie) that were both well written and told an epic story of struggle and victory.  I caught myself thinking and asking out loud, “What has happened in our world that the pure joy of reading has now taken a backseat to the social media frenzy we now see today?”

What I mean by that is simply this; that in most cases, if a line of script we see is more than half a page long, we usually bypass it in favor of a much more abbreviated, and shorter “update” that won’t take too much of our time. Newspapers subscriptions continue to shrink while more and more people are getting their information from videos and electronic devices. That raises a question for me, “Are people reading less, or are they merely getting their reading from other resource other than books and newspapers?”

            I credit the growing inability to remain focused on a single page of writing on the continuing pressure to “hurry up” in all we do.  We are in a constant “hurry up” mode from the time we awaken to the time we finally are able to ward off the last distraction and our world can once again go silent and dark, resting the overworked brains and bodies we have pushed and pulled on for most of the day.

Hurry up. I don’t know if anybody has noticed this, but while we are zipping past all the things that once used to hold our attention and thus created a solid community in our homes and neighborhoods; things like board games, visiting the neighbors with no agenda, and family TV time ( I still remember ABC’s TGIF programming), we have lost the ability to enjoy something so simple as taking a prolonged moment to read, to laugh, or to simply be an observer of the world around us, rather than a ravenous consumer of our world that only looks forward to their next meal.  We used to hunger for some R &R, and now we hunger after the “Next Great Technology.” We burn up our time and energy standing in lines for what will be outdated in less than a year.  We spend the average equivalent of a Third World’s yearly income purchasing things we think will make us happy, and have lost the ability to merely sit back and enjoy that which we have already.  Those that do are considered “boring.”

            Today what I am going to do is this; drink my coffee, enjoy my kids, and be glad that I have eyes that can enjoy the world around me. I am going to push away the plate of technology and consumption, and I think I will even turn off my cell phone.  I know, it’s boring, but that’s ok… it’s somehow, simply wonderful! 

The Cost of “Paying Attention”

I was in a line the other day waiting to pay for something, when I overheard a wife begrudgingly nudge her husband with her elbow saying to him, “You’re next, pay attention.” He glanced at her, and with a wry smile replied, “Sweetheart, I am too poor to pay attention.”

That got me to thinking; if we were to place a concrete value on paying attention, just what would that value be? Thus far, it has always been an expression used as a means to invoke purpose into our daily lives, but really, just what is the cost of paying attention?  If you are like me, you realize that paying attention is an attendant that never sleeps. It always awaits right around the next corner for you to cease from paying attention so that it may insert some form of unexpected delays, snafu’s, or mishaps into our lives. Paying attention means that your focus is now on the minutes, sometimes the very seconds as they sweep in some sort of never-ending race across the face of your watches and clocks, rather than merely the hours of the day. Paying attention forces you to take in every facet of your surroundings, examining them for meaning and purpose.  Paying attention does not let you lose sight of all that you hope to accomplish, hope to see, or hope to do.

When it comes to the lives of others, paying attention allows you to clearly communicate how much those others mean to you, and at the same time monitor their sincerity and interests toward you.  Paying attention allows you to accomplish with confidence, simple random acts of kindness that in turn help people appreciate your existence in their lives. 

Consider this; if you are a parent, paying attention means that you are emblazing in your mind every single “da-da” every single smile, every single tear, and every single time your children wrap their tiny arms around your neck.  If you are a parent, paying attention means that you, not “oops” reigns in your household and that you are able to easily ensure the well-being of those children because of it. Paying attention means that you care to have distinct and bitter-sweet memories of their constant growth, as they leave the footie-pajamas for clothes that must be deemed as “cool” by their peers.  Paying attention means that you can clearly recall the times you were up all night, changing diapers, bed-sheets, clothes, and exchanging them for memories that you now find yourself laughing about.  Paying attention in a child’s life means that you are grateful for the past, joyful in the present, and excited for the future of what your child is to be. 

If you are a spouse, paying attention means that as you see Father-Time slowly marking his days by the lines on your face, you can still appreciate all the times of love, struggle, victory, defeat, and a greater sense of purpose and companionship you have spent with your loved one. Paying attention means that you can sense before it is spoken when your loved one is ill, frustrated, sad, joyful, excited or withdrawn.  Paying attention means that even in parting, your memory will serve as a movie screen forever displaying your own life’s “greatest moments”

If you are a family member, paying attention is a simple tool to remember all the times both good and bad, and has served as a platform much like a launching pad that has been the watchful teacher to show you the way to go, or the way to defer from going down the same path.  Paying attention allows you to say with strong declaration, “I will go this way!”

So just what is the “cost” of paying attention? The cost is dearly for some; for those who wish to live a life bursting with color, excitement, vigor, and splendor. Paying attention allows you to make most of the many mile markers that all of us encounter, and impress upon us the highest form of intention. 

To those whose days are but a foggy haze, the time to wake is now and allow the bright rays of “paying attention” to penetrate your world and illuminate your future.